ABOUT ME

Hey there, I’m Maria.

I’m an ENM (Ethical Non-Monogamy) and Relationship Coach living in the multilayered city of Berlin.

I spend a lot of my time talking to people about love.

Which sounds very romantic until you realise this means I also spend a lot of time talking about jealousy, resentment, sex, boundaries, terrible communication, NRE, heartbreak, old wounds, new lovers, impossible decisions and arguments about things that are definitely not really about the dishwasher. :D

I love this work!

Partly because I find people endlessly interesting. And partly because I don't think there is one right way to love, build a relationship, make a family, or create a life with other people.

I am an idealist. I believe in big love, deep connection, relationships that make our lives larger, not smaller.

Unfortunately, I am also very pragmatic.

And somewhere between those two is probably where most of my work happens. Because wanting something and being able to live it are not the same thing.

You can want freedom and still feel jealous. You can love someone deeply and still not have the capacity to give them what they need. You can make perfectly reasonable agreements and discover that your nervous system apparently wasn’t invited to the meeting. You can understand your patterns and still do the bloody thing again.

Over the years, I’ve realised that my work keeps coming back to five things: agency, capacity, safety, intentionality and change.

Can I actually choose, or am I reacting from fear, habit or pressure? Do I have the capacity for what I say I want? Is there enough safety to stay present when things get difficult? What am I trying to build here? And how do I adapt when things change?

Because they will. Relationships change. Desire changes. Needs change. People change.

So the question isn’t how to prevent change. It’s how to move with it consciously without abandoning yourself in the process.

I don’t have a preferred answer for what your relationship should look like. I’m polyamorous myself and part of Berlin’s kink and sex-positive communities, but I’m not interested in convincing anyone that ENM is better than monogamy. I’m interested in helping you understand what is true for you, what you have capacity for, and what you want to do next.

Professional Training

Research-informed approaches to communication, conflict, friendship, intimacy, repair and shared meaning in couple relationships.
A relational and systemic approach to recurring patterns, accountability, boundaries, power and the ways partners participate in the dynamic they create together.
Training focused on the transition to parenthood and the changes it can bring to intimacy, identity, conflict and the couple relationship.
When useful, I also work with the Gottman Relationship Checkup as a structured way of understanding a couple’s strengths, pressure points and areas that may need more attention.
A strengths-based approach to resilience, wellbeing, motivation and sustainable behavioural change.
Professional training in relationship coaching, communication, structured reflection and goal-oriented client work.
Foundational coaching methodology around awareness, decision-making, behaviour and change.